You know one is studying in Nagpur when....

Five things before turning thirty

1) Make a documentary on any one really ancient temple in Tamil Nadu- a saivite temple
2) Go to a yanni concert
3) Go to brazil
4) Stop using all kinds of slangs
5) Feel like I was just born yesterday.

Mads and aku please take this forward :)

Over drinks

Mom, Dad and I went out somewhere and this is what I found...

Amma took exactly one minute to notice the reason for my sniggering. Appa still hasn't understood- he does not know hindi.

How many of you are like my appa?

Keep smiling :)

In conversation with god

I : Perumaley! (blinking hard)

God: What’s up? All good? How you doing?

I: I am ok. Not a very nice last three months. Like you don’t know!

God: I know, I know. Just wanted to know what you felt about it.

I: Ah! Nothing. Just a passing cloud type feeling. I am good. Almost.

G: It’s known as taking everything in the right spirit, you know. All part of the cycle of life, karma and all. Have you realized, all these so-called suffering has made you patient?

I: Ya. Ya. Easy for you to say. Bah! Forget it. I have stopped analyzing these things. You know, I have started seeing different aspects of life as a parallel path in the circuit of life. Even if one is not working the other paths are active.

G: Good girl. Whatever works for you.

I: So which one of the ten vishnus are you? I generally called out “permulaey”.

G: Funny, you must ask me this question. I heard you telling that friend of yours that the Vishnu avatarams were a manifestation of the impersonal to the personal. So that common folks could connect to a human form instead of an infinite supreme force.

I: Oh God! So, You do listen to everything I say or do? You saw me butting into the line the other day in the railway station, too?

G: Yeah. And also you swearing on your lab mate, the other day. What exactly was that?

I: Damn! I felt a little bad about it later, but he so totally deserved it. I would have apologized later but I don’t feel like looking at his face only.

G: Don’t worry. It’s not worth wasting your time over such faulty pieces . People make mistakes. They learn and improve or that’s how I meant the world to be. I’ve given you your own brain and a heart. It is up to you people to judge , analyze and do what you feel is right. You don’t have to be a Gandhi to be kind . You can be a normal human and be an idealist. Remember never to repeat a mistake, though.

I: hmm…. You are just like in the Geeta. Ossum wonly this is.

G: Whatever works for you.

I: I have a doubt.

G: Shoot!

I: Sometimes, when I am thinking about you in English and sometimes praying, do you like listen to me? Or If I speak in English, it’s Jesus who is listening to me.

G: Whoever gave you such an idea! Language is essentially a human parameter. Such mundane things do not affect me. You think a person who can’t talk, does not see me or talk to me. The vibes of your heart and thought convert to a message to me. It’s something like an infinite bit decoder.

I: Woah! Ok. That puts things into perspective.

G: And also, we are all the same. Your Ram, Rahim and Essu. We at different times have come and gone but have lived. I agree, we have been mis-interpreted. But, that again is your human perception of us.

I: That day during janmashtami, did you mind that I wore pyjamas and made the urundais for cheedai and pisinjified maavu?

G: Haa…

I: But, I took bath before doing all those things. You know madi and all that. I don’t see the point in pati’s take on madi but I thought taking bath before doing pooja is extremely essential. In college , junta don’t take bath for days, wear the same clothes for days together, so all the jingling mingling with them grossed me out. That’s why I took a bath after I came back home.

G: As long as you did your “pisinjification” and “uritification” happily and with a heart-felt desire, I really don’t mind you being in a pyjama. But, pati’s madi and aacharam has a scientific point to it. Instead of questioning everything blatantly, why don’t you use that brain a little more?

I: Okay.But amma is pretty cool with these things. So, it’s not much of a worry with me. She only expects us to be hygienic. Such pati ma formulae finds no place in her dictionary. And I am in peace with her take on madi-ness. It’s ok right?

G: If it works with you. Oh and nice kolam that day, by the way.

I: Really? You liked it? I made it with real rice maavu. My way of co-existing with the smaller creatures. That is the whole purpose of the kolam , isn’t it? It’s become a form of decorative piece in front of the house these days. My mami, uses that chalk powder type thing and pati gets so pissed….He he. I agree with her on this, though.What do you think?

G: Like I said, there is a reason to every custom. Good for people who realize it and for people who don’t, they will slowly at some point in time.

I: And, I also ate a little bit of bakshanam as soon as it was made. Even before, it was given to you. I told amma , I had some kind of pact with you in advance. I lied. But she totally bought it. Will you pierce my eyes? Kannu kutthuvela?

G: Ha-ha. I am you and you are me.

I: What? I don’t get you.

G: You Will. Give it time. Anything else?

I: I have this habit of drawing graphs to signify small, kutty and bigger things. Yesterday, an agnostic friend asked me to signify you using a graph. You know, I was so stupid as to actually give it a thought.

G: I am aware. So, have you come up with anything?

I: I drew something to the effect of a vertical asymptote and said that was you. It was like trivializing you. But that was to shut her up. I just told her that if she did math all her life assuming there was an infinity nobody had ever seen. But why couldn’t this infinity be God? Have I really trivialized you by breaking you into math?

G: Humans tend to do that. Don’t worry. Science can teach you how things happen but not why? Religion can teach you why some things have to be done but not how?

Isn’t it already late? Don’t you have to sleep?

I: Working on paper presentation. Talking about which, I am a little scared to present it and all. Will you come?

G: Of course I will. If you want me to come, you will see me at all times.

I: Where exactly will you be? Just so that I can look at you, if I am scared.

“You will find me there”, He said , pointing towards me and disappeared.

Dedicated to : Rav, who is always confused. Rango-nama, who refuses to understand " Hari yum sivanum onu, ariyathavar vaiyel manu" and does not visit shaivite temples in the pretext of being a veera vaishnavan when he very plainly is a jack.

We are all flu-ed!!

It was five in the morning as I woke up to start my day. After a little bit of breathing exercise, I made my way to the house to have my daily morning bottle of water. Something was wrong with it. Something terribly wrong. It was green! Green water. I waited for amma to finish her nature chores and come to the kitchen. As soon as she did , I burst open.

" Amma! Water is green ma. "

" Theriyum. I know."

" Naa kaarthalendhu paccha (quite literally) thanni kuda kudikala. Enna ma. What is happening? You know last sem, somebody found a roach in the hostel water cooler! Bwaagg. I don't even go near it now."

" hm.... Ok. So?"

" I want water. And not some green, algayish water"

" Hmm... You know all this swine flue chakkar everywhere."

" Ya, that is in Poona. We are in Nagpur! But, why is the water green?"

" You know vilva maram ?"

" The one at the back of our house, no? Enna ma, pudhir podara?"

" Your college has people from everywhere. Its scary whom all you share the air with!!"

" Huh?"

"Besides, In ayurveda such flue viruses can be fought with vilvam leaves. I have boiled the water with vilvam leaves in it. Its good for you only. By the time it is time for appa and me to return back , you will have a strong anti-flu bubble around you."

"It tastes like omam thanni" as I gulped a glassful of the slightly greenish water.

The mother, whom we shall henceforth call Superwoman without a cape (SWAC), is a non-practicing Ayurvedic doctor and extremely wordly wise. Later in the day, I read up about it and our monk who sold his ferrari says the same. I have always been fond of natural sciences, ways and means. Nature, I think, has most answers. To the ones nature asks us and for questions that come up anthropogenically.

Come forth into the light of things, let nature be your teacher.
-William Wordsworth

With pleasure

A new Vandi - 40,000/-

A new helmet to go with the color of the new vandi - 500/-

A thenga (coconut) for the vandi - god / god's so that he/ she saves me from prying eyes and wicked drivers around town - 10/-

A box of Haldiram Orange burfee for the extended family - 250/-

Amma riding the vandi and I sitting at the back facing the road with pearls of rain brushing past my face - Priceless!

There are certain things money can't buy. For everything else, nah, too cliched!

"Are you ladies wanting to have all the fun in the world?", they asked.
" With Pleasure" , we said.

:)

HDD

There is absolutely no space in my laptop, whom we shall call Betty's hard disk. One day when i was talking about my grave concern on Betty being fully occupied, a friend suggested that i ask appa for an external hard disk. Uhm, so that is exactly what i did. Went something like this.

Me : Appa

Appa: sollu.

M: You know, i have no memory left.

A: Snigger. Snigger. (looking at amma) See, didn't i tell you, she's been acting weird since she did that bungee jumping.

M: (haha!!) Arey appa, my Betty does not have memory.

A: (Putting his coffee cup down) Who? Who is betty? Isn't that a girl's name?

M: Nothing to do with section 377 , pa.

A: (regaining his calm) So, who is betty?

M: My laptop's name.

A: Laptop's have name and all? I thought you only named that teddy bear in your room. What did you call it? Some poo... poochi...

M: (cutting him short) Pooh ji maharaj ji.

A: Your friend tells me you sometimes forget their names. Infinite quota for such useless information, i wonder how you even have space for what actually matters.

M: Ayyo, appa. There is no memory left in my laptop anymore. I don't know what to do?

A: Delete few things :)

M: But, i don't want to.

A: What do you have in your laptop?

M: Why do you need all that info? Anyway, I have lot of this and that.

A: This and that, na?

M: This and that na purinjukoyen?

A: Your essays, photos, videos and project and all? (not with a straight face)

M: Yes, yes

A: Ok , let me see it.

M: You don't trust me, na?

A: I do, but i still want to see it. Maybe i could do something about it.

M: No, you can't .

After a lot of probing , the father realises that I have more movies , songs and the likes than any really "important" stuff.

A: I think, yes I need to get a new external Hard disk.

M: ( joyous smile on the face)

After I entered my room, i did the victory jiggle.

The day after this day. The father comes back home with a red HDD. My joy knew no bounds. I quitely waited for him to do the honors of handing the shiny gadget to me. He did hand it, later in the day to me and coolly said, " Yes, i did take your advice and have got an HDD for my use!! and yes, could you teach me how to use it?"

Something broke somewhere. Into a million pieces.

The father, I tell you!